7 Animals That Beat Me Out For That Job

19 Jul 2014 Animals
7 Animals That Beat Me Out For That Job

The economy is still in the midst of the worst recession since the Great Depression. Its hard enough to get a job with all the cutbacks companies make to their staff and all the crap the New York Times writes about millennials, but now I’ve got to deal with these career minded, cutey-critters? Ugh.

Proficiency in Microsoft Excel and finding sunspots to sleep in.
Proficiency in Microsoft Excel and finding sunspots to sleep in.
Graduated from Perfect Paws Puppy School with a degree in Business Finance.
Graduated from Perfect Paws Puppy School with a degree in Business Finance.
A real “go-getter” when it comes to laser pointers and bells and shit.
A real 'go-getter' when it comes to laser pointers and bells and shit.
Experience includes licking his owners toes that one time he got to telecommute from home.
Experience includes licking his owners toes that one time he got to telecommute from home.
Talk about your diversity hire.
Talk about your diversity hire.
Works well with others if dangling a delicious Beggin’ Strip above head.
Works well with others if dangling a delicious Beggin' Strip above head.
Expert in filing (i.e putting dead rats in your son’s sandbox).
Expert in filing (i.e putting dead rats in your son's sandbox).

Well there’s no way I can get a job with these fuzzy faces scouring the job market.  Guess I’ll just have to apply to be someone’s pet.  If you know someone looking to hire, give this a share on Facebook!

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