It's Important to Have Priorities, But They Need Better Ones

09 Sep 2014 Funny
It's Important to Have Priorities, But They Need Better Ones

Priorities are important. Everyone knows that some things just have to come before others. That's a given.

It gets a bit trickier, though, when you try to pin down exactly what those things are. The photos below might seem like the exact opposite of proper priorities, but hear me out here! I'm going to present their side of the story. It all makes sense when you think about it from their perspective...

...right?

1.) Back in the day, when people had priorities!

We like to think questionable choices are a new thing, but they certainly aren't. Child safety? In the old days, they liked to raise their kids tough.

2.) Safety, eating and good sleep are actual priorities.

You could be snarky about this, but then you'd be snarking on Maslow's hierarchy of needs, which you really can't do. So not only is this note-leaver recognizing their basic needs, they also offer the practical life advice of Googling.

3.) I mean, what's really more important?

Look, no one can do anything without the proper pick-me-up, be it government business or...any other kind of business.

4.) Putting things back where they came from is good manners

But not when you'd be risking dangerous food-borne illness making the trek all the wayback to the meat department. Those twentyish feet can be fraught with danger for perishable turkey. Better leave it here. And hey, you might inspire someone to make beer-battered turkey burgers.

5.) She's definitely not pleased about this.

Emotional responses to this seeming slight aside, it's a safety issue! Should there be an accident, the PS4, not the lady, is taking the brunt of it. Real priorities right here.

6.) A baby and a projectile? No problem there.

Mom's not letting being saddled with a baby interfere with her full enjoyment of life. And it's not like she hasn't thought this through: the baby's got head protection!

7.) Someone said you were supposed to stop partying when you have kids?

Just like the mom at the baseball game, Dad knows how to balance family and social life. Balance is healthy. Look, that baby is learning to balance already! Takin' after Dad.

8.) It seems like it might be a depressing transition

Of course, someone might have thought of this as clever long-term marketing. The kids who once fondly shopped here for toys can enjoy the same space 20 years later as they shop for their newfound pastime.

9.) Studying is important

Here we have another example of planning ahead. How else will you know how many tests you can brush off and still pass without this calculation. Of course, there might be a correlation between the time spent calculating it and the amount of time actually studying...but I think that requires more studying.

10.) Food is second to connectivity in this household

10.) Food is second to connectivity in this household
Well, without a modem and router set up, how can you order more food through Amazon? We're planning ahead here.

11.) You should know how to balance your accessories

The matte black really brings out the wheels here, and that, my friends, wasplanned. Besides, everyone knows plain black is always in style. So why mess with a classic look?

12.) This kid has a pretty singular idea about what they want to do

Of course, computer games can cover a lot of material. Who needs the hassle of travel, safety precautions and actual danger? Not this kid.

13.) Keeping people up to date at the price of safety

Of course, maybe we're just reading this wrong. The car is accelerating by itself while its owner looks on helplessly from the driveway. Bu, hey, at least the self-driving car isn't breaking. It's staying intact, driver or no. That's status-worthy.

14.) These guys will go out on a (literal) ledge without much support, but will hold fast to their beer.

Look, if you're going to challenge yourself like this, or if you need to save your bro from slipping, you're going to need some liquid courage. It's a security beer, you guys.

15.) Your health comes first

The ER can be very straining. Better keep your strength up!

16.) It might be defeating the purpose of a pass code...

...or it might be a trap. Enter this code and they'll know you're an outsider. Only those with special clearance know the real code. This building's security is thinking outside the box.

17.) You should spend your money wisely

Well, there's a lot of tax on game show winnings, right? Might as well use the remainder to get something you like.

18.) Most people focus on academic achievements, but...

Look, as a parent you're supposed top be supportive, right? So this parent is just looking on the bright side regarding Junior's accomplishments. Don't judge!

19.) Sure, it's a glaring safety oversight...

Bust come on, if you put your hand in that, that's on you. Think of it as a reminder to always be on your guard for unguarded fan blades. Of course, I'd like to know what priority required the front bit of that fan...

20.) Not passing up a great photo-op should be everyone's priority

How else are you going to spread the joy of childhood oblivion for years to come? It was funny when you took it, and it'll be funny, maybe funnier, when they're old enough to get it.

See, their priorities don't seem that bad! In fact, a couple of them were kind of (almost) spot on.

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